PerVersion of a Truth
by MissJinny
Summary: AU. The war has ended. Potter wakes to find the world a different place than his fragmented memory recalls. Perception of events. Snape and Lupin play large roles as well. Please read disclaimers. Not slash.
1. Professors

Disclaimer: I do not own anything even remotely close to the Potter empire. I am simply doing this because of an idea that was brought forth by a rather lovelyif not semi-depressingsong and enjoyment of the characters of the Potter series.

A/N: AU-ish. I really don't know how anything ends or who manages to make it there. Please don't review badly for that fact alone (that's why I've helpfully mentioned it was an Alternate Universe...) **CHARACTER DEATH, ANGST**. There is some insinuated past between Snape and Harry so that they aren't exactly inthe same hate/hate relationship. Don't worry, I don't think I drug it too far off kilter.

Additional: I should not be allowed to play with other people's toys if this is what I do to them...

* * *

_Playground, school bell rings again.  
__Rain cloud's come to play, again.  
__Has no one told you she's not breathing?  
__Hello, I'm your mind giving you someone to talk to.  
__Hello._

_If I smile and don't believe  
__Soon I know I'll wake from this dream.  
__Don't try to fix me I'm not broken.  
__Hello, I'm the lie living for you so you can hide.  
__Don't cry._

_Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping.  
__Hello! I'm still here!  
__All that's left of yesterday..._

_Evanescence 'Hello'

* * *

_

(Per)Version of A Truth

by: Nnif -.-

* * *

He woke up screaming. A blood curdling, vocal chord stripping, shrill scream that brought all the attendees of the private wing in St. Mungo's magical hospital sitting upright and screaming in startled reply. Lights flashed garishly outside his door, not that he noticed. His eyes had already rolled back into his head as his body fallen into spasms. 

Doctors and Medi-witches flocked through the doorway, shouting orders, casting shielding charms and trying their best to stop the seizure that was gripping the poor young man on the hospital bed. A stout woman with a stern face exited the man's room and pointed harshly at a startled nurse.

"You! Send word, Harry Potter is awake."

* * *

When one Harry Potter, savior of the wizarding world, woke two days later it was again with a scream. Not as harsh as his first, but the blood swelled in his ripped vocal chords and he ended with a whimper and nearly fell into sleep again. 

Nearly.

In its stead, he rolled painfully onto his side and curled into the fetal position, weeping into his sweat-damp pillows about something he couldn't remember. A shadow of a man moved through the entry of his room with barely a swish of robes and was soon towering over him.

"Mr. Potter." A familiar voice, though strained and weary. Harry stiffened in reaction, unconsciously doing what he would have had he known whom it belonged to. He couldn't stop weeping though, and only stuffed his face further into the pillow.

"Drink this." A cool hand on the back of his neck. A strong arm pulling him up.

His eyes were too blurry with tears and lack of glasses to make out the face, but the black robes and strong scent of wood smoke on sandalwood reminded him. There was a carefully earned trust that went with that smell, and he drank.

Harry felt drained; tired. The tears that only a moment ago refused to stop would not touch his eyes. Instead they sat heavily on his stomach where he felt them brew and build. Already he was not looking forward to when they would need to come out.

He blinked faded jade eyes and rolled away from the tall man, not wanting to see his face, not yet. "Professor." The word dry and cracked.

There was a shifting of the tall wizard behind him, but Harry couldn't make himself turn over to see what he was doing. His eyes were rimmed in heated lead, heavy and hot. He closed them and felt himself being sucked back into his head, the last thing he heard were Severus Snape's soft footfalls as he left.

* * *

Hours later, in the middle of the night when the darkest parts of the sky stood thick, Harry woke again. No screams, not this time. 

He struggled to sit up and managed after a time, panting heavily and shaking from the effort. Something had woken him, but he was too confused at his surroundings and the foreign air around him to think about it.

His stomach felt hollow; empty. He paused to think about it, but couldn't remember the last time he had eaten. There was no hunger there, only a void and Harry thought it was odd to feel so empty without really feeling anything.

Noises echoed quietly from down the corridor, hushed voices that tried to keep their urgency a secret from those residents of the hall. With a shaking hand he fumbled for his glasses on his bed stand. A moment later he pushed them onto his nose and groaned softly. Harry struggled and stood, nearly collapsing, only saving himself grievous injury by catching hold of his bed rail. The voices were getting a little louder now and he could hear rushed feet passing his doorway.

He took great, awkward steps to his door and leaned onto the frame to catch his breath. From the small window he could see a medi-witch and three nurses talking quickly to each other three doors down and across the corridor. They were worried, seriously worried about something...or someone.

The group disappeared quickly around the corner and Harry carefully pulled open his door and stepped into the abandoned hall. His body protested loudly about being moved, especially so far from his bed. Harry ignored it and staggered down the hall, trying not to bang loudly into the walls that tended to leap at him from time to time.

The ten second walk took him a full minute. Harry rested his sweating forehead against the cool stone and sighed deeply. His knees threatened to buckle but he ignored them as well.

With excruciating slowness, Harry turned and leaned against the doorjamb, needing to know what the panic was about when the whimpers and groans finally registered in his ears. He shifted and looked into the small window of the private chamber, eyes growing wide.

A man laid there, thick chains binding his wrists and ankles that were anchored to the stone floor. Great steel bars covered the man's window and just beyond it in the pitch sky lay a shining pearl that was the full moon. Another sorrowful moan escaped his lips and Harry stiffened as the head rolled to the side and pained amber eyes bore into him.

A flicker of recognition sparked in them and died just as quickly. Startled, Harry pressed his face to the glass, hand reaching for the doorknob. He stopped and shivered as Remus Lupin howled from within.

The lycanthrope's body twitched and Harry tried to tear his gaze away but could only watch in sick fascination. Silver fur grew in a wave down one arm, only to recede a second later. Ocean waves of grey hide running across the man's body, thick tufts that did not know whether to grow or stay hidden. Bones cracked, shrinking into forelegs and padded feet only to stop midway and revert. Sinew stretched to the point of snapping, muscle contorting, flesh bulging.

The grotesque play went on. Lupin's body not knowing whether to change to wolf or stay as man. A canine's foreleg, human fingers spasming into a fist. Chest caving and realigning, making breathing hard and ragged. Harry sobbed, biting his lip. Remus had his eyes screwed up tight, tears of silver streaking his face and leaking from eyes that were lined first in lashes, now in grey thatch.

Harry watched as a great drop of it ran down the werewolf's cheek, pooling like mercury along the crease of the man's lips only to disappear when those lips peeled back in a grimace.

This time, Harry's knees did buckle and he fell to the floor in a heap. His stomach clenched and he bit back the bile that rose into his throat.

A shadow fell across him and he looked up into eyes of shining onyx. Severus Snape pulled him to his feet and gave him a disproving scowl. Without a word, the dark wizard tugged Harry behind him and back to his room.

Harry stumbled, fighting the nausea that rose again. He sat heavily onto his bed and shook from his exertion. After a moment he lay back and curled around a pillow, eyes detached and staring at the blank white wall.

Snape stood in his doorway, staring down the hall at what could have been Lupin's rooms. Harry shivered as he sweat and reached for his blanket.

"Wha-what's wrong with him?" He asked quietly, voice rough as sandpaper.

Severus glanced over his shoulder to look at him, but turned back again to the hallway. It was quiet for a long time, only the sound of Remus' growls and groans echoing down the corridor made any noise. Harry didn't think Snape was going to answer, but the wizard suddenly drew in a sharp breath and began to quietly speak, almost as though talking to himself.

"He's been shot through with silver. The doctors here have been bleeding it from his system but it has been far slower than they wanted." Snape turned to face Harry's bed. "They hoped to have it gone before tonight, but they didn't."

It was quiet again and Harry could hear Remus' bed creak as the man thrashed around in agony. He couldn't stand to listen and had to fight himself to keep from covering his ears. "When did it happen?"

Severus mulled over the question, sharp eyes scanning for something on Harry's face. "The same night you fought Voldemort." His tongue only stumbling once on the former dark lord's name.

Harry's eyes widened. The terrible, painful nightmares were true then. The screams, the pain, the blood, and the death. He could only barely remember. Sharp, glowing red eyes and a viciously pointed wand. He had been angry, ooh yes, but Harry had been furious hadn't he? ...but about what, he couldn't remember.

When Harry met Snape's eyes again there was a grim satisfaction there in the dark depths. "How many died, Professor?"

Snape stiffened and folded his arms across his chest. Harry supposed it was meant to make him look threatening. Maybe it was the angle he was looking at the professor or maybe the lighting, but it seemed to him that the potions master was hugging himself. "Many."

Frowning, Harry hugged his pillow. "Too many," he whispered.

"Go to sleep, Potter. You shouldn't have been out of bed yet." Severus spoke quietly, eyes once again trained down the hall.

Harry squeezed his pillow closer and tried to relax. Snape looked back in on him a moment later and noted that Harry's eyes were closed. He walked into the room and pulled the blankets firmly over the prone form, carefully took the glasses from Harry's nose and returned to the entry. He shut the door behind him and left, only pausing once to look into Lupin's window.

Harry listened to him leave, surprised at the show of concern for him and the odd concern for Remus. Things had to be bad for Severus Snape to be thoughtful...and that led to another question for him to ponder as he fell into a restless sleep. If Severus knew he was awake others had to know...so where were Ron and Hermione?


	2. Friends

Early dawn, an entire day later, Harry woke thinking he had only napped. On his bedside table a bouquet of large blossoms sat. A light perfume came off of them and he was eased by the scent. Something akin to peonies and ginger. An odd combination to be sure, but they reminded him of Mrs. Weasley's kitchen.

That thought roused him and he sat up slowly, resting his spinning head in one hand. He pulled a small card from the vase of blooms and squinted at the writing. A smile curled onto his face and he felt a great wave of ease wash him. They were from the Weasley's. They had all signed it, every single one of them.

Harry nestled back into his pillows, a smile bordering on dopy still on his face. He fell asleep again, happy dreams driving away the nightmares for a while.

Quiet voices in Harry's room roused him from his slumber. From the amount of light in his room when he opened his eyes he guessed it was a little past noon.

Flaming red hair caught his attention and he struggled to sit up quickly, catching the attention of the two visitors that were talking. Ron Weasley rushed to him, helping him sit and smiled gently at him, eyes filled with worry.

Harry beamed at him, about to tell him how great it was to see him but the words caught in his throat. Ron looked like Ron, or at least the left side of his face did. Freckles across his cheek on pale skin. The right side of his face was not what Harry remembered of his best friend. Raw pink scar tissue, unnaturally smooth across his cheek and forehead. The eyebrow was entirely missing, thankfully the young wizard's eyelids had remained intact. Whatever had done the damage had missed his ear and hairline, almost as though it was meant only to attack his face.

"Ron," Harry gaped, trying his best not too. His friend dropped his eyes, unconsciously turning his face slightly away.

"Mr. Potter, glad to see you're awake." A cool voice reached him. Harry didn't turn away from Ron but he saw the relief for the change of topic cross his friend's face.

Slowly, Harry peeled his eyes away and looked at Severus Snape, his green eyes now and then glancing back to Ron.

"Drink this." Snape held out a glass, half full of something that looked like melted chocolate. Unfortunately it tasted nothing like it. Harry started to cough as the sludge slowly went down. Severus had a glass of water in his hand and he offered it to him. Harry took it gratefully and drank most of it before giving it back.

Snape nodded and looked carefully between the two of them. "If you'll excuse me then, I'm needed in Lupin's rooms." He turned and exited in a flourish, his robes billowing.

"He's awfully busy isn't he?" Ron asked.

Harry nodded. "He's been here almost every time I wake up. I think he must sleep in the hospital."

An odd emotion moved across Ron's face, his eyes flicking to the doorway where the Professor had been. "I don't think he does sleep." Harry furrowed his brows in confusion. Ron shrugged. "He's always running about. He's even popping into our house every other night to make sure we're all okay."

"Weird." Harry grinned. "Who would have ever thought we'd see a friendly Snape?"

Ron laughed, "I certainly didn't." His face paled and a small shiver raced up his spine. "Hermione must have though. She always did take up for him."

Confused, Harry shifted. "Where is Hermione?"

Ron seemed to choke, eyes wide as he looked at Harry for a moment before looking away quickly.

"You really don't remember, do you Harry?"

Harry looked at his lap, fingers fumbling the hem of his blankets.

The two sat in uncomfortable silence. Finally Harry could take it no longer and sighed. "What happened, Ron?"

The redhead turned his face back to Harry, eyes still downcast. "I don't remember much. A lot of panic mostly." He tried to smile, failed and continued. "I was by the Slytherin stands and a bunch of first years were huddled together on the pitch. They were supposed to stay there, where we could protect them. One of them panicked, a Ravenclaw I think, and as soon as she started running all the rest of them went with her."

Panic flooded Ron's face at the memory and Harry reached out a comforting hand but Ron shied away from it.

"The wards around the field fell and Death Eaters started coming in, picking off the teachers first and then coming for the prefects. I followed a group of the first years, they were hiding under one of the stands...don't remember which. A Death Eater followed, screaming some curse I've never heard of and his wand started to spark. I rushed him, caught him by surprise I think and flames started to pour from it but they weren't going toward the first years anymore."

Ron blinked, growing quiet. His eyes finally met Harry's. "They're all alive, you know. Treat me like a hero." The redhead tried to grin but it never reached his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Ron." Harry spoke softly.

Ron shrugged. "Hey." The young wizard shifted in his chair and rested his face in his palms for a second before dragging them down his face and looking at Harry with deeply saddened eyes. "Hermione..."

Cold dread washed across Harry, he leaned forward and pulled his knees to his chest. When he spoke, it was in a whisper.

"What happened to her, Ron?" Green eyes pleaded, wanting to know the truth but begging not to be told it.

Ron choked, coughed and ground the heels of his hands into his eyes. "Sheshe's gone Harry. Has been for some time."

The world stopped turning. All the air in the room was sucked away and Harry was left with lungs aching and eyes dry. In the doorway, Harry could vaguely make out the semi-worried look of Professor Snape as the man returned. The world started again and the air rushed back in. Harry gasped, sputtered like a drowning man and felt a flood of tears race up his throat and close it off again.

Ron was beside him, sharing his bed and hugging him so tight the bones of his back ached. Harry sobbed brokenly against Ron's shirt. "I'm sorry, Harry. I should've put it better." Ron floundered, tears streaking his face as he rocked them both on the bed.

Time sped; the sun was setting when Ron finally left, face still puffy and eyes raw. Harry lay, detached from the world and floating in a void; all of his emotions had been spent hours ago. He didn't notice that Snape made him drink yet another potion; didn't feel the man's hands on him as he straightened him onto his bed and covered him neatly with the blanket; failed to recognize the look of anger and worry on the usually dour face.

Harry fell asleep in the same position he was laid, torturous dreams of Hermione dying over and over haunting his dreams.

* * *

His eyes were sticky when he opened them next. Crying in his sleep had left flaking trails down his cheeks. Harry rubbed at his face to scrape the mess off and rolled over onto his side. He was met with the smiling face of Remus Lupin as the werewolf sat at his bedside.

A walking cane was leaning against the wall beside Remus, Harry noticed it without much thinking and his eyes went automatically to the man's legs. One of them was bandaged tightly from midcalf to the hip, a long wizards robe draped carefully across it.

"Remus." Harry smiled. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and sat up. The lycanthrope slid the chair closer and patted Harry's hand.

"How are you feeling, Harry?" The wolf's amber eyes blinked.

"Sleepy." Harry yawned, as if to prove his point. "I've only been out of bed once and I'm still exhausted."

Lupin looked at him levelly. "I know. You shouldn't have been out of bed so soon. You could have set back your health quite a bit you know."

Harry nodded sheepishly. "How are you, Remus? I...I heard you the other night."

Amber eyes closed and a shaggy head nodded. "I'm doing better." Remus smiled again and Harry hated to see the new lines on the man's face, how tired and aged he looked since he had seen him last.

"Snape told me you were shot with silver." Harry looked down at the injured leg again.

"He told me he'd spoken to you." Lupin smiled lightly, only a curling of the lips. "Yes, I was. It's a very painful experience I can assure you."

Harry sympathized and remembered only too clearly the grimacing face and silver tears. "Ron visited me yesterday." He said quietly. "He told me about Hermione."

Remus looked at him carefully and nodded his head very slowly. "I know."

Anger boiled in Harry's skin and before he could stop himself he was yelling at the ex-DADA professor. "Is that all you can say? Why not show some emotion? People are hurt! And dead, Remus! Dead!"

Remus sat still and spoke calmly. "What do you want me to say, Harry?"

Jade eyes were swimming in unshed tears when he looked back at Lupin. "Tell me it's a dream. A nightmare. That all of this isn't real..."

The lycan stood and hobbled the two steps toward the bed. Harry made room for him and Remus sat on the edge, guiding the raven haired head to his good leg and pet the unruly hair there.

"I can't tell you that, Harry."

Harry sniffed, trying not to cry again and nodded. "I know." His voice was defeated. He lay on Remus' lap for a while, calmed by the petting and knowledge that someone he loved and who loved him was still alive and well.

"You won't die, will you Remus?"

The hand on his head paused a moment before continuing. "Not today, Harry."

Remus began to hum softly, his hand rhythmically moving through Harry's hair. A single, hot tear fell from Harry's closed eyes and he fell into a light slumber.


	3. Questions

"When will he be able to leave?"

"Soon. Within the next two days possibly."

Voices. Harry could hear them but was not yet awake enough to respond. He shifted a little on his bed and woke slowly. Remus was still in his room, the chair had been moved back to the wall and the werewolf was still sitting in it. A cup of tea rested on his good thigh, and his free hand was currently pushing his greying hair from his face.

"'Mus..." Harry mumbled into his pillow. The werewolf heard him though and turned toward him with a small smile.

"Awake already?"

Harry shook his head and buried his nose into the pillow, he was awake really and knew he wouldn't be sleeping for quite a bit yet.

Remus' laughter made him smile against the linen and with a dramatic groan he rolled over and stared up at the ceiling.

Soon, a looming face blocked his view and when Harry's eyes uncrossed he saw the frowning face of Severus Snape looking down at him.

Harry frowned as well as he studied the potions master's face. He too had new creases and an ashen color. There were bags beneath the man's eyes and his pale lips were dry and peeling. Harry suddenly noticed several grey hairs at the man's temples. He didn't remember those ever being in Snape's jet black hair.

"You look awful, Professor."

The face above him cocked an eyebrow and scowled. "Thank you for that astute observation, Mr. Potter. Now sit up."

Grimacing, Harry sat and another cup of sludge was handed to him. "What is this stuff?"

Snape arched his brow again. "Apparently you are feeling better."

Harry took a large drink of the stuff and made a face. "Why is that, Professor?"

"Because you're becoming more like your brattish self."

"Severus." Remus said quietly, a small frown on his face.

Snape smirked. "He did ask for my opinion."

Harry finished the draught and handed the cup back. "I suppose I am feeling better." He smiled for Remus' sake when Severus snorted.

A shy nurse stuck her head through the entry and smiled at them. "Mr. Lupin? Would you mind returning to your room. The doctor would like to check your wounds and give you fresh bandages."

Lupin nodded, gripping his cane in one hand and stood with a groan. He smiled at Harry's worried look. "Never get old, Harry."

Harry grinned. "I'm not sure I have a choice."

The werewolf stopped at the foot of his bed and smiled gently. "For that I'm glad, Harry." He continued on and nodded at Severus as he hobbled by. The nurse smiled shyly at him and took him by the elbow, helping him down the hall.

Snape snorted and turned back to Harry. He began to look at Harry's eyes, then his throat. Harry sighed in irritation and let the man finish his examination. As he continued, Snape paused to look him in the eye. "You heard our conversation, no doubt."

Harry grunted in affirmation, not able to say 'yes' since his mouth was wide open so that Severus could look at his tongue.

"Then you know you will be free of this place as early as tomorrow." Snape released his face and frowned down at him. "You will still have to take it easy for a time. Most likely you will stay in close contact with Madame Pomfry. I'm sure she will be very happy to have you under her wing to fuss over."

Harry was quiet and contemplative as he looked at the potions master. Severus scowled under his stare. "What is it, Potter?"

"You look tired, Professor." Harry muttered.

Severus was taken aback and his arms dropped from where they had been crossed over his chest.

"Why don't you take a nap?" Harry offered with a grin. "I could sit in the chair, you can lay here if you want."

"I think not." Snape snapped. Harry watched as the man closed in on himself. Onyx eyes grew far away and closed off. The professors arms came up again but instead wrapped loosely around his stomach.

"Professor?"

"Rest, Harry. I'll be back tonight with your next potion." Severus turned, exiting quickly.

Harry watched him go, frowning slightly. Professor Snape had never been an open man, especially to Harry or any other student. But then again, Harry doubted that anyone had ever bothered to listen to him. There was something bothering him, however, and Harry was bound to figure out just what it was.

* * *

Severus returned just a he said he would and Harry watched him enter with calculating eyes. The professor chose to ignore him and set about his ingredients to mix another horrid concoction for Harry to swallow.

By the time the mug was full and set in Harry's hand, Snape was scowling and on the verge of hexing the young man into sleep. "Drink this, Potter."

Harry wrinkled his nose at the offensive smell, pinched his nostrils shut and gulped. Before he had swallowed the last bit, Snape was already on his way toward the doorway. Harry called out, choking slightly on what remained in his mouth and began to cough.

Even though it wasn't what he wanted to do, it still served its purpose when Severus came back in and sat Harry up quickly. "Foolish boy." As Harry's fit passed, Snape had a hand resting on his lower back and was scowling hard enough to crack the floor tile.

Calmed enough to breath normally, Harry caught hold of Snape's sleeve as the man started his way back toward the door.

Startled, Severus stopped and furrowed his brow. "What is it Mr. Potter?"

"Professor, would you sit with me for a while?"

Snape looked mildly surprised but hid it rather quickly. "I am rather busy Potter, and I doubt you want my company. Perhaps you can sit with Lupin if he'll have you."

"Actually, Professor I would like you to stay." Harry kept the man's gaze for as long as he could before he finally had to look away.

"What do you really want, Potter?" Severus sighed.

Harry was quiet, blinking up at Snape with a contemplative stare. "You look tired, Professor. I know I haven't been awake for long, but you're always here. In the middle of the night, early in the morning, the middle of the day...don't you sleep?"

Severus remained quiet and Harry was counting the seconds until Snape turned and left. To his surprise and mild enjoyment, Severus didn't leave. The potions master looked defeated and he deflated like a party balloon right before Harry's eyes. It was oddly disconcerting, seeing the only person to remain stoic and hardened over the several years he had known him, fall into disorder so easily.

"I don't often," Snape admitted carefully. His voice was perfectly neutral. "I catch myself napping at odd moments and wake to find something useful to do."

"Why?" Harry was a bit reserved to ask the question, from his past experience working with the potions professor he knew that it was best to let the man talk until he was finished and not fish for answers. Usually the man clammed up, realized that he had said too much and wouldn't talk to Harry for days after.

That familiar glint of annoyance flashed in Snape's eyes and Harry nearly laughed at the predictability. When Severus spoke next, Harry barely heard him as the man merely whispered and looked away. "Bad things happen."

"Oh." Harry felt stupid, unable to think of something far more suiting to answer. He swallowed hard, "What sort of bad things?"

Snape stiffened and began to stalk back and forth at the foot of Harry's bed. Green eyes trailed him in wonder. Harry suddenly didn't want to know the answer, not if Snape was getting so worked up. He didn't know whether to be watching for a tongue lashing or a horrid story. Either way it would probably make it harder for him to sleep that night.

"What do you remember of the fight against Voldemort, Harry?" Snape stopped at the foot of the bed, ebony eyes narrowed.

Harry sorted through the fragments of what he could remember. There were still a few larger pieces missing, but he had most of the pieces there. All he had to do now was take the time to sort them. Furrowing his brow in thought Harry began to chew at a thumb nail as he concentrated. "Panic. So many people running back and forth. Professor McGonagall was behind me, picking off death eaters. Covering me from their fire, I think." Harry paused, frustratedly running a hand through his hair. "Dumbledore came out of nowhere. One minute I was running toward Voldemort alone, the next" Harry motioned with his hands, "there he was."

Severus nodded slowly. He had just hexed Bellatrix when Albus had popped into being only feet from him. He had watched as the aged wizard moved with a speed and agility that belied his age.

"He said something to me..." Harry grumbled, temples starting to ache as he forced his mind to remember. "He was going to distract Voldemort." Harry's eyes widened in dawning as though he had just been told instead of merely remembering. "It-it worked but by the time I got a clear shot...Dumbledore was already falling..."

Wide, watery eyes implored Snape to tell him it was a lie. He got no reassurance when the lanky man would not meet his gaze. Harry bit back a sob and flopped backward onto his bed, staring sightlessly at the ceiling tile.

"He didn't die on the field, Harry." Snape's quiet voice informed him. Harry picked up his head from the pillow and peered at the dark wizard. "Madame Pomfrey had him removed and partly revived before they had even announced Voldemort well and truly dead. She had nearly cried in relief when Saint Mungo's came to take you. She was tearing herself into pieces trying to keep the both of you stable." A sick smile twisted Snape's lip. "I came straight from the battlefield and into my dungeons, brewing potions as fast as I could manage. It had been two days and I hadn't slept, only surviving on pepper-up potions and coffee as thick as tar."

The eerie smile fell from his lips and his hollow eyes pierced Harry right to the heart. "Poppy couldn't take it, my working myself into my grave as she put it." He snorted. "While I had been filling vials for her, she took the liberty of tainting my coffee with dreamless sleep. When I woke" Severus' voice wheezed out and he paused to clear his throat. "When I woke in a fury, Albus had passed."

A light flickered on in Harry's mind and he felt pain and pity for his professor for the first time. Snape didn't sleep because the one time he had, the most important person in his life had left him alone in a world that didn't want him. "I'm sorry, professor," he whispered.

The sick smile returned and Severus snorted. "Don't be daft, Potter. It's not your fault." The distant look in Snape's eyes told Harry that the potions master blamed himself.

"Rest, Potter. I'll be back in the morning to gather you. You'll return to Hogwarts for the next few months until you are completely healed. It may be some time before the school is up and running." Severus' eye twitched and Harry watched him as he walked to the door with slumped shoulders.

"Professor," Harry called, satisfied when the man paused to glance over his shoulder. "You can sleep, Professor. No one else is going anywhere." Harry tried to smile but it didn't stick. Severus was staring at him with an intensity he had never seen. Finally the man blinked, and he watched as Snape exited in a whisper of robes.

* * *

An hour later, Harry was lying on his back, the remainder of his tears for Dumbledore's passing drying on his cheeks. A soft knock came from his entry and he rolled over to see Remus leaning on the frame with a gentle smile. "Mind if I come in?"

Harry sat up, scrubbing his face with his shirt sleeves. "Come in, Remus."

The werewolf hobbled in and sat in the guest chair. "I hear you'll be leaving tomorrow."

"I guess so." Harry mumbled.

Remus frowned. "You should be happy to get out of here. I'm stuck here for at least another two weeks yet." He prodded Harry with a sly grin. "Besides, you'll be able to get some fresh air and visit your friends again."

A weak grin worked its way onto Harry's face. "That will be nice."

"Things will be alright, Harry." Remus said carefully. "Not everything will be the same as it was, but I promise things will get better."

"How can you be so sure?" Harry grumbled, not feeling very optimistic. He had been awake and alert for only a few days and he had only heard of death and destruction.

Lupin rested a hand on his arm. "It has to." His voice lightened and he nearly laughed. "I've seen an omen."

Harry gave him an odd look. "What omen?"

Remus winked and touched the side of his nose, "Severus came and sat with me for a few minutes after he brought you your potion, his spirits were a bit dour I admit but after he left I came here. And do you know what I saw?"

Harry shook his head.

"He had lain down on an empty cot and fallen asleep." Lupin smiled lightly.

Eyes wide in surprise, Harry could only blink stupidly.

The wolf laughed and stood. "I'll leave you to your rest then. I've got a meeting with some needles in another room anyway." Remus made a face. "I'll be sure to catch you before you leave in the morning."

Harry nodded and waved as the lycanthrope left. He waited until he was sure Lupin had gotten to wherever he had needed before he got out of his bed and walked cautiously to his door. Apparently whatever it was Snape had been feeding him was working wonderfully. Only days ago he could barely stand for longer than a minute without feeling the need to sit down. Now, though he didn't think he could run a marathon, he felt like he could do just about anything.

After making sure the hall was empty, he walked down the hall with his patter of bare feet to keep him company. He stopped before he made it to Remus' room since the wolf had said he had seen Snape on the way. Green eyes scanned the possible rooms and he decided to try the only open doorway in the hall.

When he peeked his head through, he smiled a little and entered a bit further. Severus was indeed laid out across a cot, dark hair fallen across his face. Harry picked up a folded blanket and crept closer. With a careful toss, the fabric spread open and fluttered down onto the professor's slight form.

Dark eyes snapped open and Harry stopped as his heart leapt into his throat. "What are you doing, Mr. Potter?" Snape asked quietly.

Harry grinned, "Checking on you, professor."

Severus grunted, glittering eyes watching the young man as he stopped his retreat at the doorway. He raised an eyebrow when the boy's face turned to look back at him. "Go back to sleep, we'll watch over you this time."

A derisive snort answered him, and when Harry shut the door behind him lightly and checked in through the window, Severus was already asleep.


	4. More Questions

Morning was a hectic experience. Remus had arrived to have breakfast with him, and Harry had been subjected to at least a dozen tests before he could finish it. Snape had arrived an hour later, revolting potion in hand.

Harry drank it while scanning the potions professor over the rim. Snape looked a little better than he had the previous days. Granted, there were still those new lines of age on his face, and the grey hair still streaked his temples, but the pallor of his skin looked far better and the onyx eyes that had been dull and vacant when the man was quiet were now glittering with their normal cunning.

"What are you looking at, Potter?" Severus drawled, noticing the lingering stare.

Harry handed him back the empty glass and shivered. "Nothing, sir."

Snape cocked a brow and snorted but let him be.

A medi-witch hummed happily as she bustled through the doorway. She smiled widely at the three occupants, seemingly unabashed by Severus' scowl, and checked over Harry with quick precision. "How are you feeling, Mr. Potter?"

"Well, thank you." Harry replied, eyes following the woman as she bounced around his bed and checked the runes that glowed over his bedspread.

"Excellent!" She beamed. "Your paperwork has all been completed." She turned her eyes to Professor Snape and spoke directly to him. "You will have to sign him out at the desk before you leave."

The dark wizard nodded with a slight sneer that told the woman that he was far from daft. Remus and Harry shared a grin over it, trying their best not to let Snape see.

Then, as quickly as she had popped in, the woman was gone. Severus motioned for Harry to stand and with a mumbled spell Harry felt a bit cleaner and a fresh set of robes hung loosely around his shoulders.

"Well then, Mr. Potter. I'll sign you out. Say your goodbyes to Professor Lupin, I'll be back to retrieve you in a moment."

With a sad smile, Harry walked to Remus and hugged the werewolf tightly. Remus grunted and smiled into Harry's hair. "Easy, Harry. I'll see you soon enough, no need to break my ribs."

Harry smiled sheepishly, "Sorry."

There was nothing in the room that Harry could claim as his. The flowers the Weasley's had given to him, he had taken to the children's ward. He wouldn't need them, they were only flowers after all.

So he stood, looking around the small room that he had woken in a week ago. His memory was still fragmented. He would scare himself sometimes. Something simple would set off a memory he didn't remember and he would be sucked back into the hell of the war for a jolting moment before he blinked and it was gone. Harry wasn't sure if he should be thankful for the terror to be returning slowly instead of all at once, then again the questions of what happened were driving him insane.

"Ready?" Snape stood in the doorway, thick robe swaying at his ankles.

Harry nodded and gave Remus a final hug before following Snape into the hall. He looked over his shoulder once to see Remus standing outside his room watching with a small smile. Harry waved to him before he rounded the corner at the end of the hall and then Remus was gone from sight.

"Listen to me, Harry." Severus said quietly. Harry started, Snape had only ever used his given name a handful of times since the war had started, and it usually meant unwelcome news was coming. "There is going to be quite a lot of people rushing you once we leave the building. Reporters, gossip hounds, everyone has questions and the question of what has happened to you has been the biggest of all of them. We'll move quickly, don't look at them if you can help it, and for the love of Merlin don't talk to any of them."

A hard look and a sneer were aimed at him, Harry simply nodded and swallowed thickly. Suddenly he didn't exactly feel like he was well enough to leave. However, before he could mention his queasiness, the front doors of Saint Mungo's were in view and a second later they were on the sidewalk and rushing toward the Three Broomsticks.

Before they had even made it a block, great gaggles of people were whispering and pointing. Severuswho was walking behind Harry with one hand curled around his wand just in casehad a hand pressed to the small of Harry's back and was edging him along quickly. "Keep moving, Potter." He mumbled.

Seconds later wizards and witches began flooding the streets, shrieking and yelling excitedly. Harry's eyes grew wide and his pace picked up further until he was only a faster stride away from jogging. His head spun from the noise and bustle, he was thankful for the hand at his back that seemed to keep him tethered to the present.

"Mr. Potter how are you feeling?" One voice shouted over the noise and cheers. "The wizarding world is thankful to you, Harry, what will you do now?" Called another.

Harry gaped, opening his mouth to speak when Severus' harsh voice curled into his ear. "Not a word, Potter. Keep moving."

Their haven stood large in front of them and as soon as the doors closed behind them, Harry ran for the back wall with Snape in tow.

They were standing on Hogwarts' grounds a minute later. Harry stopped dead on the walkway and gaped openly at the sight as his heart clenched painfully in his chest.

"It looks a fright, doesn't it?" Severus whispered.

Harry nodded. Part of the Forbidden Forest lay in burnt timber and ruins. Ash and charred earth circled the damage by nearly twenty feet. The lake was still and black; lifeless. "The squid" Harry started.

"Is alive." Snape finished for him. He took Harry by the elbow and pulled gently to get him moving again. "The darkness of the water is from the ink. Before the fighting had started, it began to stain the water. It was one of the first omens that the war was starting."

Following the professor, Harry looked up at the school and blinked away a fresh brew of tears. The northeast tower had fallen, rubble lay for hundreds of feet beyond it. Black soot had charred two of the outer walls where fire had burst from the stained windows and fire licked out of them. The gate itself was bent and warped. In the distance he could see what had once been the Quidditch pitch, now with no stands and only charred beams. The whole place looked entirely deserted.

"Is there anyone left?" Harry whispered, not speaking any louder for fear his voice would crack.

"Yes. A great many of the teachers found help and survived. Most are home now while volunteers are helping to clean up what mess is left."

Entering the castle hadn't made Harry feel much better. The Great Hall was barren. There were no tables, no banners, only a great empty hall that smelled of smoke. The high cathedral ceiling was actually seen, no magical skyline. Harry looked up at Severus, the tall man was gazing into the hall as well, an unreadable expression on his face. "We can't seem to make the smell go away permanently." He spoke as though to himself. "No matter, there are far bigger things to fix before we have to worry about airing the building out."

There were places along the floors and walls that were far brighter and cleaner than the remainder. Harry wondered why for a while as he followed the potions master toward the infirmary until he noticed that one of the impressions was the shape of a bodya fallen body. He stopped looking at them after that.

Madame Pomfry was in the hall when they made it to her wing. She gave Harry a watery smile and hugged him tightly when he was close enough. She pulled away with a sniff and held onto his shoulders while she looked him over. "How are you feeling, Mr. Potter?"

"I...I don't know." Poppy nodded. She'd had a similar reaction when she had returned to Hogwarts after going in to Diagon Alley for supplies.

"Well, come in here then. You'll have to stay here in the wing for the next few days until I'm sure you're able to stay on your own." Madame Pomfry opened the doors and ushered Harry in. Severus stayed in the entry and nodded to them both as they walked through. When the doors swung open again the hall was empty.

Most of the beds had occupants. Even a month later there were students and adults alike lying about with various ailments and injuries. Harry got several nods and a great many grim smiles. For the most part he nodded back, just like everything else he had seen in the past few minutes, it was a bit overwhelming.

Madame Pomfry led him to a bed in the back corner, a little farther from the other patients and by an open window. Normally, Harry would have been thankful to have something to look out at while he was resting. The view out this window though, was not something that would bring him ease.

"You take it easy, Harry. I'll be back in an hour or so to give you your medication, then you may have something to eat." She smiled sadly at him and bustled off. Harry watched her go and tried to tune out the murmurs and groans of those around him as he lay back to sleep.

* * *

"Wake up, Potter." A stern hand was shaking his shoulder.

Harry woke up with a grunt and stared blurrily up at the smirking face of Severus Snape.

"Get up. You need to drink this." A strong smelling vial of potion made Harry recoil. Harry looked around for Madame Pomfry and found her helping a wailing boy on a far off bed.

He took the medicine grudgingly and drank it while holding his nose. Harry's eyes trailed to the window and Harry frowned deeply, he had forgotten the destruction in his sleep. It had been thankfully free of dreams.

A newspaper sat haphazardly on his bedside table. _Voldemort is Dead!_ Screamed the headline. _The Light has Won!_ Harry frowned deeply at the titles.

Snape took the bottle from him and followed his gaze to the paper. He snorted and pushed the paper off of the edge of the desk and watched it flutter into the waste bin. He sighed and stood, ready to make his leave.

"It says we've won." Severus stilled and turned back to Harry. The young man was staring out at the ruins of the Forbidden Forest, a deep frown on his face.

"That's what they say, Potter." Green eyes met Black. Severus sighed and set the empty vial on a nearby table.

"How is this winning?" Harry asked, eyes watching the creatures of the Forbidden Forest slowly clearing up the great chunks of charred earth and trees.

"The truth does not exist." Severus said quietly. "Winning is a misconception. A perversion of a truth."

Harry thought of Hermione, Dumbledore, and Ron before his eyes searched among the beds and found their way back out the window at the ruin of the grounds. He felt ill. Anger, at what exactly he didn't know, flushed through him so intense his hands shook.

A cool hand wrapped his wrist and Harry looked up at Snape. "Get some rest, Potter. There are still pieces left to pick up and you'll have to deal with it just like the rest of us." Harry nodded, hands clenched into fists. Severus released him and looked down at him for a moment. A young man with so much death and responsibility wrapped around him he could suffocate...and yet he still continued his struggle to the surface before he drowned.

"Don't believe everything, Harry. You'll find the truth, you already know it." Severus kept Harry's gaze a moment before the closest thing to a smile Harry had ever seen touched Snape's lips. "You wrote it."


End file.
